Mind Your P's & Q's

Oh manners, you were thrown out the window and now we want you back! It’s really interesting to see how manners have become the topic of conversation amongst friends and on the radio- hence the reason for writing this blog.

I think we all need to resort back to the days of old- well sort of. Sure lessons with Dick & Jane are slightly outdated, but fundamentals are the building blocks to fun in life. If everyone applied this theory to manners, we’d find more joy in day to day life, the work place, and especially dating!

FOOD: I recently went to my favorite sushi restaurant with my friend Lisa and there was a middle aged couple next to us. The man sitting directly next to me insisted on sucking his water through his teeth which made an extremely bizarre sound, that once we realized what it was, found disgusting. It’s kind of the same concept when it comes to eating chips, pretzels, or anything crunchy- be mindful of how loud you are. That sound doesn’t just echo in your own head it’s heard by other people. My friend Lisa decided enough was enough and started to lean in and glare at him any time he did it.

Answer me on this one (because I really don’t know)- WHAT DO YOU DO IN THAT SITUATION? It’s really difficult to tell someone “Hey I can hear you slurp and it’s interrupting our conversation?” I’m not sure.

CHEWING: Please chew with your mouth closed. You are not a cow or any type of farm animal and I don’t wish to see the bolus in your mouth. It’s disgusting and really makes you look gross. You can be one of the most attractive people in the world, and I even mean if you are on the same level as the Beckham’s, but if you are gnawing your food and munching with an open mouth- you are doneso.

FINGER LICKING: I bring this up for one simple reason. I feel finger licking is appropriate in certain circumstances. Buffalo wings and BBQ ribs. Everyone knows that sauce on buffalo wings and ribs is delicious and that’s ok to lick off your fingers (as long as you aren’t being grotesque). HOWEVER, please make sure you aren’t licking your fingers and then using them to grab wings or ribs from a communal dish- that’s disgusting and unsanitary.

THANK YOU: If someone does something for you or pays you a compliment, even if you don’t like the person, or didn’t ask them to do it for you- say THANK YOU! This becomes a big pet peeve of mine in the office. I don’t think anyone should regard themselves as better than anyone else regardless of their position within a company. Many times I have noticed my boss demands things of administrative staff, but she doesn’t say thank you- I have to do it for her. If someone does something you don’t care for or didn’t really need, say “thank you , but I would have prefer you not do that”- it’s simple, direct, but polite.

CALLING ALL GIRLS! If a gentleman pays you a compliment- say thank you. I used to be very timid and shy about receivng compliments. Instead of saying thank you, I would awkwardly make an excuse as to why my hair didn't look nice, or why my outfit wasn't nice (even if I thought I did look ok). Have confidence in yourself, and trust that the person giving you the compliment is telling the truth- BECAUSE THEY ARE. People don't give compliments if they don't mean them.

PLEASE: I don’t use this as much as thank you, but I use it if I really need to do something or want something. You don’t need to throw out the PLEASES for everything. For instance you don’t need to say “May I please go to the bathroom?” That’s a necessary action, not request. If you gotta go you gotta go, youdon’t need tosay please. But if the request is ok’d (which it should always be) you can give a quick thanks!

ELEVATORS: YES ELEVATORS. I’ve started to notice now that some people don’t wait for those already in the elevator to exit before they get on. Some people just butt their way in- REALLY? REALLY? It’s not a ride at an amusment park, and you’re not going to get to your floor any faster by jumping on. PLEASE allow people who are already in the elevator to get out. By not doing so you could make them miss their floor if it’s crowded. And you simply look like a tool. (Same applies for Metro)

DOORS: Gentleman, this pertains to you only! Whether it’s a doorway, elevator door, any thing you swing open and walk through (a door) LET THE LADIES GO FIRST. If there are a line of ladies, guess what you have to be the door man for about 15 seconds. Us gals consider this to be a big ticket item. Walk ahead and get the door, if not- hi rude and totally unattractive and unacceptable. If you can’t get to the door, and your not alwats going to, that’s ok. Girls don’t need every door opened, but it’s a nice gesture and shows us you know your date manners.

CAR DOORS: This is funny, I’m actually not a fan getting car doors opened for me. I think it takes a lot of time and effort, I don’t really get it, but if you want to do it go ahead. I don’t want you to run around the car because you think I’m sitting in there too long to either get in the car or let me out. I can get in myself thank you I’m a big girl. But hey go for it if you want to , or if you think your lady likes it.

BURPING AND FARTING: Yes I’m bringing these up- and you might find my reaction surprising. It totally depends on where you are and the company you're with. There are times where I am guilty of belting out a burp that would make any beer guzzling dude proud. However, you have to know how to burp under your breath as to not make a spectacle of yourself. Farting is farting, sometimes you can’t hold it in and it just happens. If you can go to the bathroom or somewhere private if you are in public or with a mixed group of people. No one wants to claim their fame to a fart because they smell horrible- so do your best to keep it private.

Your most intimate friends and family are different, you fart in front of eahcother all the time (guys have no quam about farting), but if it smells like liquid fire and cheese I’m not interested and don’t wrap me in a lethal burrito under the sheets- you will be kicked in the balls.

HOSTS: Always say thank you to your host if you go to someone’s house for dinner- especially if you’re meeting the parents. It takes effort putting a dinner on and the best compliment a host or hostess can receive is a thank you. I’ve hosted a few fun dinners myself and I appreciate simple thank you's so much. It makes me so happy to know the people who came to join me enjoyed themselves- whether they like the food or not they always say thank you and that's why I love my girlies <3

Also keep in mind that manners are different depending on the region you're in. We can all agree the North is very different from the South. In fact, I'm pretty sure my burping and farting section would make any Southern Belle cringe with disgust. BUT, we can all agree that everyone can appreciate manners and simple human decency- so check yourself, please :)